I am quite adept at the art of the rubber band ball. Many years ago, I managed to secure myself a job at Gillette which was willing to pay me for doing nothing but create for them a massive rubber band ball. My title was "Project Analystr" and I was great at it. At its greatest circumference, the rubber band ball was twenty bounds of tightly-wound rubber spirals. It was the best job I ever had. Unfortunately, one day, the ball accidentally rolled off my desk, and the resulting ricochet effect caused so many ruptured organs, chaos and destruction that I was let go without a reference.
I suppose I'm lucky I designed that rubber band ball before September 11th, because if I made it in today's culture of fear, I'd probably be in Abu Ghraib, at least according to this account on flyertalk of a traveler who was detained by the TSA for flying with a rubber-band ball.
At first, the TSA claimed it was doused in a flammable liquid. When that proved not to be true, they claimed that an X-Ray Machine was picking up a metallic core. And when that claim also turned out to be baloney, they started accusing the guy of being a drug smuggler, which is the charge they eventually arrested him for. He was jailed for 24 hours: when they cut open the rubber band ball, it was completely empty.
Okay, it's hysterical. But keep in mind that this is what happens when you let politicians, government agencies and terrorists capitalize on your fear to take away your rights: you get thrown in jail by absurd bullies for possession of a home-made superball.
I got arrested this week at a checkpoint! [Flyer Talk]
