Jose Canseco takes job as Athletics TV analyst, will probably say crazy things

Remember Jose Canseco? Big guy, used to hit a lot of home runs, dated Madonna, played for about a dozen MLB teams, ended up bizarrely being the Cassandra for steroids in baseball? The man who once seemed like a Hall of Fame lock more or less flunked his way out of the league thanks to a potent combination of injuries, steroid suspicion and his own general weirdness, then careened into a post-career life of legal trouble, reality television, celebrity boxing and a gun-related mishap in which he nearly shot one of his fingers off; he's more or less a walking amalgam of weird news stories about Florida. Today, you can find Canseco on Twitter, musing about the forthcoming robot uprising and providing (surprisingly coherent) financial analysis in between promotions of whatever his latest project is (currently: a movie called Slamma Jamma—about a wrongfully convicted felon who takes part in a national slam dunk competition (?)—in which he plays a judge).

But while Canseco's post-baseball days have been a prolific mess of nonsense, it hasn't included much on the sport itself, save his occasional rant about the Hall of Fame and steroids. That all changes this season, however, as the Oakland Athletics—the team with which he debuted and that made him famous—have decided that they want to embrace chaos on their pre- and postgame broadcasts.

There is a 99.99999999% chance that Canseco turns every one of his appearances into some Dada-esque stream of silliness, and I am extremely here for it. There is also a 99.99999999% chance that he says something that gets him fired within one month of starting this job.