The Invisible Wounds of Acne: National Acne Awareness Month

Working as a registered nurse in a cardiac surgery step-down unit, my shifts are composed of chest incisions, lines, tubes, and heart rhythms continuously displayed on a monitor...all of which I can see and maneuver with my hands. It is, therefore, understandable when my patients complain of pain. In fact, I can already even tell before they say anything by their grimaces, hand placements, and breath rhythms. But what if a condition brings about inner sentiments that cannot be seen or interpreted? What if a condition is physical, but its gravity transcends what the body can say? This is how acne was for me: physical visibility, but its lasting wounds in full concealment.

Acne, according to the American Academy of Dermatology, annually affects up to 50 million Americans making it the most common skin condition in the nation.1 Varying in manifestations from superficial bumps to deep cysts, I don’t know anyone who appreciates having any form of it. I remember the first time I ever saw pimples on my face in eight grade. I was in the car resting my head on the window when I caught a reflection of my left cheek covered with bumps. It just spiraled all the way down from there throughout high school and bouts of college. My acne became so severe that I cried each day I looked in the mirror. I avoided any opportunity where I saw my own reflection.

I was so ashamed of my skin. I didn’t want to go out. I wore hooded sweaters during summers so I could hide my cheeks. I purposely grew out my bangs to hide my scarred forehead. It even came to the point that when my mom would ask me what I wanted for my birthday, all I wished for was a trip to the dermatologist. I was convinced that everyone was disgusted of me. I thought that no one would ever like me. I didn’t even like myself.

I tried everything. Prescribed and OTC creams, antibiotics, steroid shots, concoctions from different countries...nothing worked. I lost hope. So no, acne is NOT just a physical condition of visible bumps and cysts. It creates invisible wounds that seep down deeper into one’s psychosocial being: pain, anger, anxiety, fear…all of it. But I’m so thankful that things do get better in time…and with belief and persistence. By finding the right products AND people over time, I was able to finally achieve a skin that I am now happy with.

With June being National Acne Awareness Month, I hope to share the messages of both hope and understanding to all those struggling with all forms and grades of acne. I understand the underlying pain and questions. Yes, we are all beautiful and worth it regardless, there is no question in that. But the self-confidence and peace that acne takes away…there are answers to that. Just as my dear mentor board-certified dermatologist Dr. Daniel Sugai told me, “Acne does not need to be glorified, but we should normalize it and have people know that they can seek help at any point.”

Please seek available help, research products, have patience with yourself, and have hope that things do get clearer...both in and out. It will.