A Dream Come True: David Cantero Draws Occam the Barbarian

Once I heard Neil Gaiman speak of his compost heap—a term he used in order to describe all those impressions and artifacts that end up “influencing” his writing. Somewhat disappointedly, he remarked that people’s expectations about that compost heap were quite narrow. Most of us assume writers are influenced by novels, singers by songs, and so on.

In reality, inspiration is messy. Gaiman singled out Lou Reed as one of his biggest influences. “His songs,” he said, “are like three minute novels.”

When I started writing Sex, Drugs and Tales of Wonder, I was sitting on such a huge compost heap that the book practically wrote itself. In its middle, there’s a story cycle about an old civilization, started by a prophet called Vulnicurus (obviously a Björk reference), whose teachings inspired a culture that became so refined and pacifist, it lost its edge and with it, the ability to defend itself.

The idea that sophistication leads to decadence is an old cliche exploited since Antiquity, most notably by historians like Tacitus, who thought his fellow Romans were becoming too effeminate in the trappings of imperial comfort. It’s a preposterous assumption that hasn’t received the amount of ridicule it rightfully deserves, so I decided to give it a brutal, Pratchett-esque treatment. I created a barbarian, named him Occam, and unleashed him on the perfumed worshippers of Vulnicurus:

“I am Occam the Barbarian! I killed a python with my bare hands when I was five. I broke the neck of a horse when I was ten. I strangled an elephant when I was fifteen. At twenty, I impregnated thirty women in a single night, and when I was done I still had an erection, and each one bore twins, except the last one, who gave birth to triplets.”

Up to that point, my characters were realistically-looking people in fancy attire. Occam, however, popped out of my compost heap as a full-fledged, pencil-drawn comic hero, a caricature of virile masculinity taken to its absolute extreme.

Satirical hyperboles aside, the defining reason I ended up in a Roger Rabbit situation was that at the time I was writing, I came across the Exodus comic series by Spanish illustrator David Cantero. He belongs to a very special breed of humans who are blessed with a supernatural ability to mix hardcore erotica with poetry. As I was illustrating the final version of Sex, Drugs and Tales of Wonder, I attempted to imitate his style and draw Occam bursting through the gates of a palace. It was an absolute disaster that shall remain unseen by mortal eyes.

Once I made peace with my personal limitations, I promised myself I would commission David at the first chance I got. That moment came at the end of 2020, after Sex, Drugs and Tales of Wonder sold its 1000th copy and I cashed in hundreds upon hundreds of euros.

I sent David a description of the scene. A couple of days later he replied with a sketch that looked straight out of a Vulcan mind meld. He had captured the essence of the character perfectly, which is hardly a surprise since he was the actual source of inspiration.

As you can see in the minor spoiler below Occam made it to the throne room of his sworn enemy, Sophisticus the Wise, the pacifist ruler of the Margraviate of the Windswept Hill. Click here to find out how that ended. Once the sales reach 2000, I’m calling David again! :)

You can find more about David Cantero’s work on his personal website or join me as his supporter on Patreon.

Occam the Barbarian, from Yanko Tsvetkov’s Sex, Drugs and Tales of Wonder. Illustration by David Cantero.